I’ve always heard that there are two things you should never talk about with friends and family: politics and religion. It’s interesting to me, because I grew up and still live in the United States of America, where separation of church (religion) and state (politics) are founding principles.
Okay, fine, so the government is not supposed to tell people what religion they can or cannot practice/observe/join/give their hard-earned money. I like that and I support it whole-heartedly.
What arena does that leave us regarding these two subjects? Friends and family. But there’s that pesky policy of leaving them out of it, so we’re stuck.
For a moment, let’s step back and assume that co-workers are merely acquaintances, not friends. Does that mean that work is the best place to talk about religion and politics? Seems like a risky prospect to me.
So, considering that and following the understood “rule” I stated in the opening paragraph, that leaves an audience of one — yourself.
One option is to engage perfect strangers in political and/or religious discussion. The Internet has become a popular place to do this.
Let’s ask ourselves this: would we rather discuss such important topics — the kind that can have a profound impact on our lives and our after-lives (if you’re so inclined) — with complete strangers who may or may not be portraying themselves accurately, or with people we have known and (I hope) trusted all our lives?
Another possibility is to trust the media and form opinions based on the comments of those accustomed to and interested in staying in the spotlight. This, too, seems risky.
At family events on either side, politics very rarely comes up, and religion not at all. Any partisan comment is left to hang in the air until it eventually dissipates into the ether, like an accidental belch. Besides a 30-second expression of “thanks” before major holiday meals, talk on religion is limited to “are you staying for church on Sunday?”
In my family and my wife’s, there are lots of very smart, respectable people. Overall, they have done an excellent job of providing for and loving their families while living within the system the USA’s founding fathers established more than 230 years ago. They cover a wide range of socioeconomic groups, and their political and religious leanings by no means are identical. Same goes for our friends.
Yet, for some reason, we’re discouraged from using them as a forum for healthy debate on serious issues. What better audience could we possibly find?
Lately, I’ve tried to buck this trend with a more personal approach. I speak to these invaluable resources individually, rather than in a group. I did this all the time in letters to my late grandfather. Perhaps the understood rule means “friends and family in a group.” That, I can get behind. Because nobody wants a heated argument when a forkful of sweet potatoes is in the opponent’s arsenal.
With whom do you talk about politics and/or religion? With whom do you not?
