Feb 25 2008
But They Might Spit in It
Do you think people who wait tables for a living can be all that smart?
That was the exact sentence, minus the question mark, that someone typed into a Google search. I know because it lead them to my post called “I Don’t Wait Tables Anymore“, which appears to be the only hit on the first results page that covered a related topic. No, I didn’t address the intelligence of wait staff, but it was about being a server.
More than looking for an answer, the question seems to be positing a hypothesis. Because, let’s face it, when a question like that comes out of somebody’s mouth, he or she already has an opinion on the matter. Hostility is inherent in the wording.
I can’t remember ever questioning a particular server’s intelligence, unless we include a few with whom I used to work. That was more due to general stupidity than holding that particular job.
Now, the hosts and hostesses were a different story. Complete morons.
No, just kidding. Everybody knows that the real dolts are the cooks.
Now I know for sure I’m joking, because I was amazed at how much information the cooks could absorb from an expediter shouting food orders.
I waited tables for only two years, while in college, and I’m not sure I was smart enough for any of it. Let’s break this down.
Every server where I worked was required to put in two weeks of kitchen duty before beginning server training. We made salsa, refried beans, grilled chicken, burritos, hand-battered chicken strips, and everything else you can imagine in a Tex-Mex kitchen. No, there were no microwaves, and yes, everything was made fresh to order.
Part of my job during that initiation was to chop ungodly amounts of jalepeños, cilantro, onions, etc. for the pico de gallo, salsa, and various other sauces. After mixing said ingredients into large plastic containers, I lidded said containers, dated them, and shoved them into the walk-in refrigerator.
At home that night, my hands were pink(er than usual), and they felt like they were on fire. I had washed them thoroughly before chopping the spicy vegetables, but this was before the days when everybody handling food wore latex (or nylon) gloves. It was that last bit that did me in. Nobody had explicitly told me to wear gloves, and the thought never entered my huge but obviously largely untapped brain.
My hands smelled like onions and burned like jalapeños for about 10 days. That’s learning a lesson the hard way, or, because self-deprecation is so popular these days, the dumb way.
I did okay at the job that got me in the door, but I didn’t set any records for most drink refills remembered. By the time I got back to the kitchen, I had started whistling or humming some song and the thought that anybody needed a refill was nowhere to be found. More times than I like to admit, I strolled happily back out to the dining area and, like a deer caught in headlights, I stared blankly at empty glasses on my tables. “Dammit” became a popular word to utter under my breath.
For me, I guess it was more an attention issue than a question of intelligence. Most of my co-workers also were college students, and while I would like to say that somehow increased their likelihood of being smart, I can’t. There were a few who were in it for the long haul, but they were just as smart as the rest of us — insofar as the job at hand required. Beyond that, for all I know they could have been dumb as posts.
What do you think?
I went to school to be a chef, and was one in a 5 star restaurant for a while before they changed format. I loved cooking.. and before that I was a bus-boy, then waited tables before getting my shot in the kitchen with a great chef.
Believe me…. everyone in a good restaurant has to have intelligence. In the fast food ones… I can tell about examples of kids that can’t tell what the change back from $2.00 is for a $1.50 soda.
When you were training for those two weeks before ‘rising’ to the level of server, I’ll bet you didn’t… how can I phrase this delicately: pleasure yourself more than one time, eh? You know, being Mr. Jalapeño Hands and all. C’mon, tell me that didn’t enter everyone’s mind reading this just now! Or was it just me?
I have certainly met some stunningly simple servers who probably couldn’t claim much in the grey matter department, but I don’t think that was much more than a relatively statistically accurate sample of the population in general.
I remember working when I had to figure the customers change because the cash register didnt do it for me. Hard to believe that I can get the wrong amount back these days!
I held my fair share of restaurant jobs through college before settling into being a bartender. It was fun….VERY fun….and it isnt easy getting all that straight. I think it is like every other jobs…some people are jsut more competent than others. I dont think is it servers, hostesses in general.
:)
I was a waitress at a restaurant for a few months, I sucked at it. I didn’t enjoy it. I really disliked serving people because I am a princess and I like to be the one receiving the service. Seriously though it was demeaning, waiting hand and foot on people, catering to their every whim. It was just not for me.
Never worked food service before, but I had enough friends who did that I have real respect for those who do it well. For one, they are wading through a very chaotic environment while doing their best to set a semi-relaxing atmosphere for me, the customer. Not to mention, that anyone who is responsible for the food I’m about to eat should be treated with the utmost respect (see title above).
Dave - That is so cool. Surely I already knew that about you. So, did you like the movie Ratatouille?
Simon - You know, I can’t remember whether I ever did or if it caused a problem. I was married by that point, and newly married, so one would hope that never crossed my mind.
I agree that it’s more reflective of the general population than anything else.
Anna - For some reason, even though I know you like Margaritas, I never would have pegged you as a bartender. That’s great.
Amy - I think I sucked at it too, but I stretched it into two years because I was married and had to bring in the dough somehow until I had a post-college job.
As far as feeling demeaned by waiting on people hand and foot… um, so then you became a mother? Hmmm….
I don’t think that was a factor for me, until some jerk asked me my major, and in reply commented, “Remind me to never let my kid be an English major.” He might have a had a point, but still.
Moksha G - Never? Wow. Somehow I figured it was somewhere back there in your storied past. I definitely have a healthy respect for anyone who does it well. It’s very stressful and you’re constantly on stage in front of the customer, while trying not to piss off co-workers when they don’t do what they’re supposed to be doing. It’s much more complicated than most people ever consider.
Plus, there’s the fact that in many states they don’t get paid anywhere near minimum wage, but a lot of customers don’t know that and think the tip is “extra.” I got paid $2.12/hour when minimum wage was $5.25.
Welby MD….It’s pretty common knowledge by people in the professional world how difficult it is to wait tables. I think it’s excellent for building character, and despite the terrible comment by the customer, it is actually viewed as a big positive for people screening for potential job candidates.
Most people don’t know, but there are career waiters/waitresses out there who do very well at the high end restaurants. If you’re working in places with $200-500 corporate outing tabs, and getting 20%, it adds up pretty quickly if you’re good. It’s the being on your feet all day that got old for me.
A lot of servers think that you get big tips by buddying up to customers, but the truth is that the less you say, and the more you serve….the more people will tip. I used to cringe when servers would walk up to a couple and start asking them questions. Hello…they aren’t here for that!