Dec 12 2007
The Two People You Meet at Discount Tire (Part One)
I found a chair near Discount Tire’s showroom windows and sat down. My wife had blown out a tire on the minivan again, and instead of one of those pluggable holes you always hear about, she had ripped a sidewall gash big enough for a baseball. She never does anything half way.
So, there I sat on my lunch hour, in limbo between novels I’m intending to read, with a purported half hour to burn. The magazine rack, to my left and lacking anything particularly interesting to me, offered up “The Sporting News” and various automotive rags. I went for sports.
“Well, you do what the nurse says,” said the woman sitting on the opposite side of the magazines.
She held her mobile phone up to her mouth as if finishing off one end of a corn cob. A girl’s voice warbled from the earpiece.
“No, you can’t take it because it isn’t signed in with the nurse,” said the woman.
I flipped through the pages predicting the Heisman trophy winner as the woman wrapped up her conversation. She sighed and shoved the phone back in her purse.
“Dealing with a sick kid?” I asked.
“Yes. We’ve both been sick.” I briefly considered how rude it would be to get up and move down a few spots. “But she’s not running fever so they won’t send her home, even though she feels bad.”
“That’s tough. So, you can’t just send something with her for her symptoms?”
“You can, but I forgot to write a note for the nurse, and if she got caught taking it we’d both be in trouble.”
“Wow, I had no idea it was like that these days. I have a lot to look forward to. Mine’s only four.”
She blurted a laugh that fell just short of sinister. “Just wait.”
I turned back to my magazine, but the stranger said something else and off we went, small-talk randomly mutating into conversation. Maybe my personality’s still as disarming as someone told me back in college. Then there’s my tendency to ask questions. I used to blame this on my days as a reporter, but I’ve always been curious*. Here’s what I know about the woman after fewer than five minutes:
- she drives a bus for the local public schools and likes it
- she used to be a chef for a nationally known country club that hosts major PGA events (name withheld here for privacy), but health problems ultimately prevented her from standing for long periods of time
- her daughter, 14 as of November, attended a “mom’s day out” program two days a week until time to enroll in kindergarten, and ever since has done swimmingly well, even in pre-AP courses
To be fair, she didn’t just spew forth her personal details unprovoked. She left knowing this about me:
- my son is four years old
- he attends “school” two days a week and the jury’s still out on whether he’ll start Kindergarten next year or do a year of pre-K
An employee called out a woman’s name. “Already?” My new stranger grabbed her purse and headed to the counter.
“Nice talking to you,” I said. She didn’t hear.
I turned back to a story about Barry Bonds’ selfish soiling of Major League Baseball’s most coveted award.
“It was very nice to talk to you,” said a now familiar voice. “Good luck with your boy.”
I looked up to see the caring mother who happened to be a bus driver. “Thank you. I hope you and your daughter get well soon.”
“Thank you!” she said, and walked out the door.
A simple conversation like that is much better than reading an old magazine rehashing the story of a fallen idol. Had I ignored her sigh I would have deprived myself of a rich personal interaction. What better place than a tire store to bring us all together? Maybe a barbershop? I had an even more diverse experience there, and chronicled it in a post that most of you probably have never seen.
As far as the second person I met? Come back Friday.
* Perhaps to counteract my inquisitive predilection I should buy a shirt that reads, “I’m blogging this.”
O.K., this is really strange. That lady used to live next door to us when we lived in our apartment. When you said she was a school bus driver, I wondered if it could be her. Then you said she used to be a chef, and I knew it had to be her. Small world!
You should SEE how tough some schools are now about both prescription and non drugs!
My daughter could tell some great stories about that….
Sounds like you had a nice conversation…. and yes, you do seem very “disarming”.
ps, we’re getting up to 10 inches of snow up here today.. *frown*
You know, I’m much more likely just to nose my way into the paper or a book and not make any effort at interaction with strangers. That’s my M.O.
Neat that you mentioned the Heisman trophy since I was in a buddy’s car on the weekend when the winner was announced on the radio. His last name began with a “T”. That’s all I remember. And from what my buddy said, he was the odds-on favourite to win it.
I’ve seriously thought about buying that exact T-shirt, but restrained myself. Something I have to exercise very regularly when I browse that particular website. I have a wishlist compiled there that makes me drool a bit.
I’m not sure what the award is, but you definitely get something for useing two four-syllable words in a row there at the end of the post.
I’m horrible at small talk. I tend to keep my nose in the book not so much for my comfort as for the comfort of the person who mistakenly thought it would be pleasant to chat with me. Once we get to the actual conversation part of communication, I’m golden. But my “chat” skillz are woefull, I fear. And my wife is, sadly, the same way.
Had a nice couple stop to talk with Moonshot and me the other day. We had just finished a stroll around the block with Norah and this couple was out for a similar romp with their 20-month old son. How perfect, yes? A local friend for Norah. A nearby Mom for Moonshot to get to know. Yet, we Grens were not up to the task. We fumbled and spit our way awkwardly through a few minutes of banter and then made excuses to retreat inside.
Also, if this lady IS the same one LAN knows…that’s a crazy small world story.
Lan - That is crazy wack (whack?). Just when I thought I had kept the details anonymous enough, you rush in with your whistle blowing skills. Pretty cool coincidence, and it got you to leave a comment. Score!
Dave - So, did a teacher slip your daughter a roofie, or what?
10 inches of snow. Hmm… makes me miss living where we at least saw proof that snow existed.
Simon and Moksha - Oh, I’m not a social butterfly or anything. I usually take my book with me wherever I go when expecting to wait, but I happen to be between reads right now. Even something as base as “Entertainment Weekly” will keep my attention over a stranger in a waiting room, but they only had Auto and Sports mags. Still, it was a nice chat and it seemed to lift her spirits.
Simon - I was interested in the Heisman because an Arkansas player was in the running for it. He got a very large chunk of the votes and was in second way ahead of anybody behind me. So, the first loser, basically.
Thinkgeek.com is addictive!
Moksha - It’s hard for me to picture you as an introvert.
We don’t know our neighbors very well. In fact, we most often see them when leaving for or arriving from someone else’s house.
Oh, I am an introvert. But I’m not your typical self-conscious, too shy to talk to people introvert. I am (and I know this makes me sound bad) a self-obsorbed introvert. I’m off in my own world or dealing with things that matter to me and I just don’t like being pulled out to talk about surface level topics with someone who hasn’t already been deemed “important” to me. And so, I’ve never flexed those skills. I’ve never learned to make small talk effortless and fun. I have to consciously try to “get..to..know..this..new..person.” So, even once I decide the effort is worth it for some specific person…it’s rather painful to watch…like Martha Stewart trying to act nice. Now, take away one of those two issues and I’m golden. Deep conversation with a stranger? Easy if we find the right topic quickly. Inane banter with friends? Absolutley. But inane with strangers…my my, look at the time.
Well, you could probably guess that I would strike up a conversation with just about anyone. Heck, I have been downstairs twice to chat with the carpet installers. I don’t even think that they minded. It is a fine balance that I have with Simon because he is not a chatty guy but will hold his own with a stranger who will strike up a conversation.
Yeah, I can relate to Moksha’s way of introversion. I feel sort of hoity-toity for saying it, but I mostly can’t be bothered with the small talk. I’m all about the inane banter and good conversations… but mindless pleasantries?? I, uh, have to go wash my hair.